Island Living

Sooo...getting back into the daily grind is proving to be a little difficult. I was gchatting with a friend, and she calculated her hourly wage based on her salary, which turned out to be a pretty depressing figure. And I make less than her per year. This naturally caused us to question our career choices...why are we trying so hard (well...sorta hard) to climb the corporate ladder to afford our metropolitan lifestyles? Is living in the city THAT worth it? Obviously we needed to consider an alternative: community island living.

The scenario I have in my mind is a collective of about 50 really cool (preferably attractive) people ages 23-35 pooling together all of our savings or even just emptying our checking accounts and building a huge commune in, say, Bali. It would be helpful if some of these people had family money to help start us off, but it's not a prerequisite. Once we've established ourselves and done a Costco run (is there Costco in Bali?), then we will figure out how to become sustainable. Obviously we can fish and grow pineapples for sustinance, but we will need a means to pay the electricity bill and the cable bill (I still want to be able to watch Vampire Diaries, ok? It's my new favorite show).

So far my friend and I came up with cocaine and pies as a way to generate income. I think that part of the plan needs about ten more minutes of solid critical thinking. The point is, we will find a way to support ourselves without relying on corporate America. At this point, the real living can begin.

Our days will begin with group yoga, followed by a brisk run across the island and back (um how big is Bali again?). Then everyone will make breakfast (fish and pineapple) and head to the beach for a good 6 hours of sunbathing. We'll return to the commune for siesta, followed by book club. Then we'll prepare dinner (fish and pineapple) and get ready for the nightly party. Yes, there will be a party every night, and we'll play our own music and dance as we sip homemade rum. Finally, we'll drift off to sleep under the stars.

I get that I'm not the first person to have this vision, but really I'm wondering why more people don't go this route. We made a list of pros and cons and the only cons we could come up with for leaving society for good were:

• no happy hour
• no Sephora
• no restaurants

I can't believe it either, but these are the only things that motivate me to be a member of society. Obviously I won't need happy hour on the commune because I won't need to unwind since I won't work. Restaurants I'll miss, especially on a diet consisting solely of fish, pineapple and rum, but it's not a dealbreaker. No Sephora...this is a problem, I'm not going to lie. However, if I'm really tan, which I undoubtedly will be after sunbathing for 6 hours a day, I won't need much makeup.

The writing is on the wall...I'm actually surprised it took me this long to come up with this plan. It's probably because I was scarred by small town living for 18 years. That's totally different than island living though. I'll just have to be really careful when selecting the 50 members of my commune and make sure that everyone is really interesting and fun so that I don't get sick of them. Does it sound like I'm starting a cult?

Never mind...who's with me???

La Vida Loca

Well! Where to start...

Basically I've just been living my life, topping the charts, stacking up millions, wearing sick couture outfits on the red carpet, and vacationing with hot athletes in Mexico. Oh sorry, that's Rihanna's life not mine! Sometimes I get confused because our lifestyles are so similar.



KIDDING! My life is a little different then hers. For one, I haven't been warm in months and I wear a scarf every single day now because my neck gets cold without them. I try to make it a fashion statement but I think people are catching on. I'm basically the palest I've ever been because I've made the mature, adult decision to stop spending my hard-earned money on tanning beds when every inch of my skin is covered up anyway. My clothes, while cute, are not exactly straight off the runway. But I did go on vacation!!!

Yes, in case you missed me last weekend I was partying in Vegas with five of my favorite "bitches" and honestly, Rihanna would be proud. I can't share all the sinful details, but lets just say that our trip included a complimentary gourmet meal of filet mignon and truffle mashed potatoes (ordered for us by our VIP host of course), a criminal number of shots (key lime pie shots are THE BUSINESS), and a fun-filled evening with some Afghani oil heirs at Tryst. I indulged (almost) all of my vices and it was freaking amazing. That brings us back to reality.

Back in this dreary little city that I just can't get enough of, big changes are on the horizon! After almost two great years of cohabitation, my lovely roommate and I are amicably parting ways. I will obviously miss our late night corner store "sweet treat" runs, epic Halloween parties and Tuesday nights watching Bad Girls Club together, but I am excited to get my own place! All by myself! Part of me wonders if I will turn into a complete recluse living alone...it's possible. I'll let you know how it goes. Actually if I do turn into a recluse, I'll probably stop blogging so maybe I won't let you know how it goes.

On a serious note: last week, when I wasn't preparing for Vegas or searching for a new apartment, I was working on a tribute to Howard Zinn, the amazing historian, writer, activist, and playwright who recently passed away, for www.spectrumculture.com (a badass website that I write for). As stressed as I was, it was very interesting and inspiring and I'm so glad that I got to write about him.

I highly recommend reading Zinn's work--he re-wrote American history from an entirely new perspective, and told the shameful truths that many of our high school history teachers (not to mention to US government) didn't want to divulge. A documentary is coming out based on his work later this month and you can see the trailer here, to get a little taste of what I'm talking about. If you need me to name-drop to keep you interested, it features performances by John Legend, Sandra Oh, Rosario Dawson, and many more, so check it out. I know I flipped the script there and got really serious, but it was for your own good! Open your mind!

xoxoxo

Jess